Do you ever watch a movie after thinking the trailer was hilarious, but then you realize all the good parts were actually in the trailer? That's how I'm feeling right now......
ASIDE FROM THAT! My sister came over last night, and I must admit, I wanted there to be more interaction. She came over to introduce us to her boyfriend, but we barely spoke over dinner except for the gentlemen telling some jokes that really weren't that funny, they were quoting movie lines. Then we watched A Night At The Roxbury, then I begged everyone to play a game (which no one wanted to), so we watched Scrubs episodes on DVD. Q-U-A-L-I-T-Y.
Why are we so opposed to interaction, unless it is absorbing or regurgitating something we have been fed from people who don't know us? I am experiencing the same thing with another friend, who is saying great things, but then I find out someone else said them first...I don't want to hear from that friend the same thing I can read in a book, or watch on a movie, or hear in a sermon - word for word. I want to know my friend's thoughts. My friend's developed, or immature, thinking. Something from real people around me.
I heard a sermon (ha! how ironic and hypocritical!) in which the speaker said we must go into interactions full. (The rest of this comes from me, promise!) We need each other desperately, but we should thirst for our God more, and the other people be our support and barriers, but not our fulfillment. If we fill ourselves with the confidence of the imperfect, we are sure to be let down when the blemishes show and our source of life is cracked. BUT, if we allow ourselves to be filled by God's perfect grace and strength, how much greater is that source? Consequently though, who wants to do that, because then we can't take credit for what drives us, but God gets the glory. That is the nature of the flesh to fight the will of our Father. Bummer.
If, now, I were full of this, would I have had a better night? Here in my home were two people, and they left without me really knowing anything new about them, besides their choice of entertainment (which some could argue tells you a lot about a person, but I would hope not to be thought of as "that girls who likes sitcoms"). I can't help but think that, if I were full and not seeking acceptance and sustenance solely from others, I would have been totally consumed with learning about these people (my sister is included in that, regrettably) and asking questions that I wanted to know about the things they needed to share. I have a great vision of how last night could have, and should have, gone, but I lost that in my sense of flawed confidence. How sad is it to live a life of from seeking others, when I know where I can have all these needs met, and more! How patient is a God who hears you pray and beg for fulfillment, only to have you abandon it in the moment and retreat to a blemish filled existence when others, who are crying out for something, are watching. How great is a God who let's you come back to Him and ask again for forgiveness.
If my life, your life, was a movie, could they even find enough "good parts" for the trailer? Hum....
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